Wow. No.
Yany, Shuen and I just saw the worst/corniest/retardedest (haha I made up a word!)/funniest movie evar.
Ultraviolet
Guess what it's really about? I don't care if you don't wanna know because you plan to see it anyway.....because you really should save the $7. Vampires! But they use a fancy alternative word "hemophages" until about half way through the movie to try to mask it!
The leader of the evil vampires has the retarded cliche unintelligable "where the fuck is that guy from?" accent...which we just ended up assuming was a "Transylvanian" accent.
The setting was the cliche futuristic city in some asian place, even though only a handful of the people ever in it are actually asian.
There was lots of fighting...but hardly ANY blood! wtf!? where's the gore?!!?
She could just spin really fast with a stick and K.O. like 30 guys. In one revolution.
Worst. CGI. EVER.
Seriously....its 2006...The Matrix from years ago had 1000x better graphics.....Not even the buildings looked believable. Talk about pathetic. It made me very sad.
Turns out the movie was based on a comic book/manga. Why do they insist of making horrible comic book adaptations?! The only decent one to date still is Spiderman..and -maybe- Sin City or something. That's about it. Should have stopped when you were ahead, guys.
Mila Jovovich constantly had to be showing her midrift/belly button throughout the whole movie, despite no one else dressing like her at all. Great way to be conspicuous when 100 armed soldier dudes are looking for ya! I think it might be some sort of weird contract she has...because I think shes had her midrift showing in all her other few movies too.....(I know in the 5th Element the belly button was present through pretty much all of it)
So yea. Go watch another movie. Or at least, if you -do- see this...just sneak in after your first movie, as a light-hearted comedy to end the night.
Since when did I become a movie critic? Since when -wasn't- I? Hun, I critique -everything-. Just cuz you don't heard it don't mean I ain't thinkin it XD
Ultraviolet
Guess what it's really about? I don't care if you don't wanna know because you plan to see it anyway.....because you really should save the $7. Vampires! But they use a fancy alternative word "hemophages" until about half way through the movie to try to mask it!
The leader of the evil vampires has the retarded cliche unintelligable "where the fuck is that guy from?" accent...which we just ended up assuming was a "Transylvanian" accent.
The setting was the cliche futuristic city in some asian place, even though only a handful of the people ever in it are actually asian.
There was lots of fighting...but hardly ANY blood! wtf!? where's the gore?!!?
She could just spin really fast with a stick and K.O. like 30 guys. In one revolution.
Worst. CGI. EVER.
Seriously....its 2006...The Matrix from years ago had 1000x better graphics.....Not even the buildings looked believable. Talk about pathetic. It made me very sad.
Turns out the movie was based on a comic book/manga. Why do they insist of making horrible comic book adaptations?! The only decent one to date still is Spiderman..and -maybe- Sin City or something. That's about it. Should have stopped when you were ahead, guys.
Mila Jovovich constantly had to be showing her midrift/belly button throughout the whole movie, despite no one else dressing like her at all. Great way to be conspicuous when 100 armed soldier dudes are looking for ya! I think it might be some sort of weird contract she has...because I think shes had her midrift showing in all her other few movies too.....(I know in the 5th Element the belly button was present through pretty much all of it)
So yea. Go watch another movie. Or at least, if you -do- see this...just sneak in after your first movie, as a light-hearted comedy to end the night.
Since when did I become a movie critic? Since when -wasn't- I? Hun, I critique -everything-. Just cuz you don't heard it don't mean I ain't thinkin it XD
posted by Aleia at 3:27 AM
1 Comments:
haha...hoorah "doooo eet bilet dooo eeeet" XD!!!
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